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As the holiday is fast approaching us all, I know all to well the feeling of being alone.  The feeling of abandonment or the very least something close to it. The holidays, the birthdays and the anniversaries will be the hardest in the first few years.  This is the time when you will find the strength for endurance. The knowledge you have done your best, and you have no regrets with your love ones that have passed. 
What I can tell you, is that it is ok to be selfish. You need to take the time you need to grieve or be angry as this is the hardest part of losing someone. 
The guilt that you feel, that follows you, is guilt that never brings them back or fixes what you may think is broken
What I can say is that the guilt does nothing but take away all your energy.  It wastes your time when you know deep in your heart, your loved ones want you to carry on and live your life. 
They, we, are only meant to be on this journey for a short period of time.  Take the time to honor them, grieve them, but most of all LOVE YOURSELF! As they have loved you and want you carry on with life and all it has to offer you.

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